Keep it simple
Last week's blog post topic (flow state) has stuck with me. I was cooking today, like back to back meal prepping for the kid, while making dinner for us adults, and I don't historically LOVE cooking. I wanted to distract myself; put a podcast on, or a show on my iPad for example. And then I remembered flow state. Why not just circle in on being present as I create nourishing food for my gorgeous little man? So I did. And it became more enjoyable. I focused better. I became immersed in the process. I let go of the clock and my addiction to having noise on in the background. I felt good!
Amazing.
This stuff works.
Anyway, I have come here to share an epiphany I had this week.
Epiphany: Feeling content is actually super easy.
It is us that makes it hard.
Hear me out…
Laws for a content life (from my perspective)
Connect deeply and authentically with other humans
Find ways to be of service, daily
Move your body with delight
Eat whole foods with a nourishing mindset
Keep learning, be a forever-student
Slow down and delight in your surroundings
Nothing there is totally crazy. To do all of the above, we need to have a positive relationship with ourselves. And that is the hard bit.
How it can be hard and easy
Law 1: Connect deeply and authentically with other humans
We were literally designed to connect. They say connection is the antidote to addiction. It is critical. Here's how we make it hard… we prioritise communicating over connecting. We sit behind our phones sharing our thoughts to hundreds of people, instead of next to a friend on the sofa. We focus on talking instead of listening. But remember: we have 2 ears and 1 mouth for a reason. Prioritise vulnerability, deep connection and active listening.
Law 2: Find ways to be of service, daily
We're told it is a dog eat dog world out there. I found while I lived in London that you update your community what you've been going through after the fact. I now seek community that goes through it with you and shows up to help you move house. Being of service to others boosts self-esteem. Solid self-esteem supports the prioritisation of doing the next right thing. It is cyclical. But in the West we are so hyper-independent we don't know how to offer or accept help. I literally had to be so sick I couldn't feed myself to learn to say “yes, please, that would be so helpful”. I couldn't even walk and my instinct was to say “no, don't worry about dropping food over, I'm fine.” Insanity!
Law 3: Move your body with delight
Every fitness expert has another angle on what is the best way to move your body. Weight training is integral. But not too much or it'll damage your joints. Cardio is amazing. But HIIT is better. Do yoga for body and mind, but run 5 miles a day for longevity. It is pretty hard to navigate with so much conflicting information. However the most beautiful way to move your body, is with joy. Dancing in the kitchen. Walking under the trees. Climbing with your kids. Move everyday. But don't overthink it! Don't make it punishing. Keep it light.
Law 4: Eat whole foods with a nourishing mindset
Keep it as nature intended, and marry nourishment with pleasure. Simples.
Law 5: Keep learning, be a forever-student
Read, ask questions, listen to experts. Keep the mind open and youthful by remaining curious. Thinking you have all the answers is a sure fire way to lose purpose and momentum to continue moving forward. And it can come across as a bit smug, which ain't all that cute.
Law 6: Slow down and delight in your surroundings
Always running late, always chasing the next opportunity and looking so far ahead we forget to smell the roses. Stress kills. Care for your nervous system. Be gentle. Don't rush. This is hard because we are in an instantaneous world so to move slowly on purpose sounds lazy and defunct. It is actually magical. This is my ultimate wellness hack!
When we care for ourselves and nurture that relationship, all of this becomes second nature. Why wouldn't you want to fuel your body properly if you love it? Why wouldn't you be humble enough to continue learning if you know your self worth is unconditional?
If you want better results, why not come at it from a place of kindness and simplicity?
Easier said than done. We are drenched in shame, regret, guilt and resentment. We are conditioned to aspire to the unachievable. We are wired to want more.
You're not wrong for feeling any of these ways. But it is possible to actualise a deep sense of peace. Gratitude is a fast track. Mindfulness is foundational. Consistency turns it into a life!
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